Find Reassurance In Homeschool Gaps

Hebrews 11:1~"Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen" 

Have you ever been fearful of gaps in your child’s education? We are speaking life over that fear with help from our homeschool veteran friend, Cindy DiMarco whom we spoke with in our latest podcast release. This blog is an extension of that conversation and worthy of its own space instead of on the cutting room floor.

Cindy was a Kindergarten teacher in the public school system before she had two sons, CJ and Colin. Her main goal for her students back then was that they leave her classroom with an intrinsic love of learning. Of course, that spilled over in a beautiful way into their homeschool.

We know her words will inspire and encourage you as she tells how she faced challenges, such as delayed reading, and chose to view the gap (and other challenges) as the opportunity to embrace her child’s unique creation, gifts, and talents.

In the process, she nurtured both of her boys’ confidence and has seen both of them go from a chance introduction to music education in their homeschool to playing music on the big stage to running their own small businesses.  

If you haven’t listened, check out our podcast episode 14, “Music Education Helps A Homeschool Soar!” where the first part of their story unfolds.

Enjoy sitting in on the rest of our discussion:

Kim:  Tell us about Colin’s other passion.

Cindy: Woodworking. Yes, he does woodworking. And that started way back when he was little because he was very interested in carving. He started with a block of soap and a little plastic knife and then I would just talk to people along the way. We went to the Fair one time and there was a gentleman there carving and I mentioned that my son is really interested in wood carving. What do you suggest? He offered to teach classes..that if I got three other kids, he’d come to us! I'm like, really? Sold!

I set up a table in the front yard because they're chunking up wood everywhere and Charles is working inside. We did that for five years and we had 12 kids in that group.

Kim: When people hear things like this focus on music and woodworking they may think, new homeschool moms especially, that this isn't worthy of homeschool topics. Aren't those extras? But in my mind, and you have seen this, these are in fact incredibly valuable experiences.

Cindy: Oh, they're huge.

Kim: And it's okay to be a core of your time, especially if it's one day a week. I imagine the woodworking class took a lot of your time that day. 

Cindy: It did. Think about it, we have our kids, we're being a student of them, we're watching them. Where do we as adults live? We live in our strengths and what we're good at. Do we all have to be at the same level? My kid needs to know how to balance a checkbook and be able to do a banking account. He's not gonna be a math scholar somewhere, but if he can go and build a piece of furniture, because that's what he loves to do, he can make a living on that.

Yeah. I think homeschoolers sometimes get it flipped in their mind thinking that academics is the end all, be all. But my whole philosophy in homeschooling was raising lifelong learners. If you teach 'em to love to learn, they will never quit. And that was one of my things when I was in the school system, I taught Kindergarten and my goal was that they would still love learning when they left. 

So many kids, because of the way the system is set up, are always seen as a failure because they don't meet the measurable objectives. But then who created those? You wonder who created those objectives? Who says who does what when? One of my sons didn't read prolifically until he was in fourth grade. As a teacher, that was horrifying. But he did it and now he sits and reads CS Lewis and Tolkien.

Kim: Homeschool moms, listen to this. Her boy could not read until he was in fourth grade. What age is that? About nine, ten years old. But he ended up playing performances at the Grand Ole Opry, Country Music Hall of Fame and Carnegie Hall.

Cindy: It's one of those things you keep giving life experiences to see what clicks. That one didn't click, that’s okay. We've done a lot of that. There's been a lot of “not click” things along the way.

Kim: Let’s go back to the fact that our children supposedly don't succeed on the measurable outcome scale of the school system. We have a choice. We could go the route where we do all of the interventions and modifications and try to get 'em in that box, right? Or like you. We can stand in our strengths like we as adults do, right? And love to learn and incorporate that somewhere else. Instead of trying to squish them into this thing. God made everybody unique and this is why it's okay to wait on a child’s individual outcome timeline.

Cindy: Oh, yeah and at the end of the day, you don't come out with a relationship with your children. You don't want to have them as an adversary, and they always need to know that you're on their side. No matter how hard it is, you're gonna love them. You're gonna be there. They're gonna get it. Eventually. 

I tell these young moms, your child is a flower in the garden of life and every single one blooms differently and it looks different. I think we've embraced uniformity across the board. God didn't make us like that. No. We're unique. We're individuals. We are His creation, and He has a purpose and a plan. If we try to make everything look alike, what a boring world. We miss the beauty of God's precious creation.

Kim: The word that keeps coming to mind is gaps because when you talk to new homeschool moms or if you do any kind of evaluating there are concerns about creating gaps.

Cindy: Oh, we have a big gap in ours. The boys can't spell for love nor money.We get the lowest scores on spelling. I'm like you can't even spell in your text. Oh my goodness. We always kid: you're just homeschooled. You can't spell  We make it a running joke.

Kim: Nobody needs to spell anymore cause it's all autocorrect anyway. Seriously though, everybody has gaps someplace, but the beauty in that is we can embrace their passion and their interests.

Cindy: Nobody’s gonna be good at everything. You can't. That's right. We're not capable and I think in homeschooling we, as moms, put too much pressure on ourselves that our kids' performance is a reflection of us. I don't care what learning environment your child is in, they're gonna be who they are.

You would not feel that way if they were in a structured school setting. You feel that way cuz they're with you, but your kids are gonna grow and learn at their own rate despite us, believe it or not. Yes. They pick up stuff on their own. So we need to take a lot of that pressure off of ourselves, that who they are is solely based upon us.

And that our value is based on how they do. Yes, be dependable and efficient and thorough and do what you need to do. It's not a bye to not teach your children, but if you've done your very best, you have to trust God with the rest. That's my favorite: "You do your best to trust God with the rest" because they are His. He created them, they're gonna learn to their ability and He's responsible for that. Not us, we didn't make them. We are but stewards and have the honor of stewarding them. The end of the day, they're His and I think there's a lot of freedom and a whole lot more enjoyment when we reach that point of taking that pressure off. Then you can actually enjoy your kids for who they are. 

Kim: Like you said, this notion which is one of my favorite things I heard from another veteran homeschool mom: “At the end of the day, you just want their heart.”

Cindy: Oh, Amen. What you said. Yeah.

From all this nurturing of their strengths, both of Cindy’s boys built the confidence in their talents/interests to use them to start their own small businesses. They operate by mostly word-of-mouth and are a way for them to benefit from their hobbies as they work their way through college. 

Kim: Both of your boys are entrepreneurial. Tell us a little bit about that. 

Cindy: CJ has a coffee company. It's Goldline Coffee. It's small batch roasts. And he makes it to order and then Colin has his business, Forrest Fiction. He's selling his woodworking creations. 

Kim:  I'm sure there will be lots of Christmas shopping heading their way.

Cindy: CJ just bought a much bigger roaster so it can go quicker now. But it's still small. He buys the beans green and roasts them. My house is very busy. 

Kim: I wanna be your neighbor. Probably smells so good. Your boys are definitely busy and bold in trying many ways to use their strengths and talents! 

You can check out the boys’ offerings at the links below and if you’d like to order anything send them a direct message through Facebook. Check out their YouTube channel in which they came together again, like they do with their music, to make a few, fun “Vodcasts” titled “Christmas, Coffee and Contemplation”. 

For an extra-added bonus that will make you smile, check out the music video for the project “Sing Through the Bible”  in which they were featured. This is an impressive piece of work and it’s encouraging to see how these young men are using their gifts to further the Kingdom! 

Forrest Fiction woodworking creations

Goldline Coffee

Sing Through The Bible music video

“Christmas, Coffee and Contemplation” Vodcast:

The final part of Cindy’s story is not so much related to homeschooling as it is to the state of the world in which we do so. We are taking this opportunity to highlight her involvement in her husband’s ministry, New Life Solutions which has been helping pregnant moms and families in general for 35 years because we would love for you to join us in prayers of support for this and all efforts in the battle to bring abortion to an end. Please consider supporting their efforts and look for us to link arms with them for their annual Walk For Life each Mother’s Day.

Kim: Probably the most important and beautiful thing about your family is that your husband is the President of New Life Solutions and just a little side note, Charles and I went to middle school together.

Cindy: That's what happens when you live in the same place for a really long time.

Kim: When you  were my daughter’s teacher at the co-op I made the connection. Even back then, he was a leader in student government and, actually, one of my close friends had a huge crush on him!

Cindy: He was always the vice president. The one that doesn't do anything but gets the title because he's smart. 

Kim: No, he was just saving it up because now he does so much! Tell us about this ministry. 

Cindy: New Life Solutions is an umbrella organization and underneath it has several different resources for families:

>Four pregnancy centers, two in Pinellas county and two in Hillsborough county.

>More To Life, which is a program for schools discussing wise, healthy choices. It’s focuses on SRA, which is not abstinence, but sexual risk avoidance. Bullying, drugs, wise choices, all those things. 

>Passages Of Hope, which is post-abortion grief recovery for women that have been through the pain of abortion. Amazingly, the age range there is 20 to 78. It can take up to 25 to 30 years before people start to deal with the pain of their abortion and be honest about it.

>Shepherd's Village which is a home for single moms.

 It’s a robust ministry wherein we're reaching dads too because they have the greatest influence on women, the father of the child, as to whether or not they'll have an abortion. We have spiritual classes, finance classes, and a boutique that has items for moms. They earn certificates to get free items there like clothes and diapers. 

Kim: Do you take donations for that too?

Cindy: Oh, yes. We've had churches do baby showers for the pregnancy centers and collect clothes and diapers, all kinds of baby resources. 

Kim: So many opportunities for people to volunteer their time and efforts to the ministry directly in one of those programs working directly with moms and families. As well as take a more indirect role by working in the boutique or supporting through donations.

Cindy: Oh, yes, ma'am. 

Kim: It’s an important ministry and we hope, through The Homeschool Well,  we can support your annual Walk of Life. I thank you so much for joining us and encouraging homeschool moms to lean into their child’s unique strengths and talents and even use them as a means for income. 

Cindy: Oh, thank you. I’m praying faithfully for your ministry to homeschoolers. 

Kim: We appreciate you giving back to our homeschool families!

Cindy: Thank you. Take care. Bye bye. 

Check out New Life Solutions here.

We hope you take away as much inspiration and encouragement from this as we did, and let that trickle down to your children, as you continue to breathe LIFE into their strengths and talents and continue to nurture a lifelong love of learning!

⛲️ Have more questions about wellness for homeschool moms? That’s why we created our community and classes. We are here to help homeschool moms find answers to their questions and solutions to their problems. Be your child's BEST teacher! JOIN us today! ⛲️